I help grieving children be supported, their way
Children’s Grief Support & Postvention Specialist l Researcher, Educator & Speaker l TEDx Speaker
I’m Shelley Brunskill-Matson.
I get it. Children’s grief is one of those topics most people don’t want to think about. It’s sad, messy, and at times, outright confusing.
Given you have found your way to this website, it is likely that you are already intimately familiar with the reality of children’s grief; as a parent or a caring professional.
Do any of the following statements describe you?
You care deeply and desperately want to support the children in your care, the best you can.
You worry you’re not currently ‘doing enough’. You have a nagging sense you ‘should be doing more’, yet you’re unsure what that ‘more’ might look like.
You feel ill-equipped to know how best to offer support.
If you’re a parent, you may be grieving yourself, making it even trickier to be able to be fully present to your children’s needs.
If any of these resonate, know that you’re not alone in your experience. No one teaches us how best to support grieving children in school or when we become parents. Nor is, supporting grieving children, covered in teacher training, or in sufficient depth, in counselling training. Given this, it makes sense you might be struggling to know how best to support the children in your care.
That’s where I can help.
Considered a global authority in children’s grief support and postvention, I help grieving children be supported, their way. I do this through speaking, offering one-on-one support and education, and developing tools, resources and programmes.
Working together
Click on the heading that best describes you to find out more:
Not the website you’re looking for? Looking for support after suicide? I am also the Co-Founder and Director of Tony’s Place Charitable Trust, Support After Suicide. Click on the logo to visit the website.
“I am on a mission to change the way grieving children are viewed and cared for”
Interested to understand more about my approach? Click here or watch my TEDx talk. In my TEDx talk, I shared the findings of my PhD research in which I explored the care and support experiences of children aged 6-13 years, following the suicide of someone close to them.
My findings - based on the voices/experiences of the children I interviewed - highlight the key role of mattering when supporting grieving children. Children only experience behaviours intended as care and support, as caring and supportive, when those behaviours reinforce a sense of mattering.
Based on my research, I advocate that in order to truly support children, their way, we must change the way we view and care for grieving children. We need to adopt a mattering-reinforcing care approach.
“All teachers and school counsellors need to attend this. I wish I'd known, what i do now, years ago!”- School Counsellor, workshop attendee
“A quality workshop; the information was invaluable; the authentic delivery with passion and no apology was amazing... would definitely encourage others to attend.”- Teacher, workshop attendee
“Shelley radiated such a 'heart' for the subject matter. I came in with very little knowledge about supporting children and now feel equipped.”- Teacher, workshop attendee
“Shelley, I can't thank you enough for what you have done for [child's name] and [child's name]. I know they've enjoyed meeting with you each week and I can tell how much you've really helped them.”- Mother of 7 & 9 year old clients, following the death of their father.
“Brilliant. Please present to Government to help shape policy.”- Teacher, workshop attendee
“Thank you for this afternoon's session. I found it incredibly useful and would definitely like to schedule regular appointments. What you said made a lot of sense and it was nice to be able to talk to someone who truly understands.”- Bereaved Mum, supporting a child
“Thank you for helping me. I now know what happened wasn't my fault.”- 9 year old client whose Dad had died six years prior.
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